Tag Archives: friends

The Company that we Keep

One of my friends made a comment on her Facebook page the other day and it got me thinking. It was something along the lines of “do you judge people based on the company that they keep, and has your judgement been wrong?” At first, I didn’t think anything about it but then I realized that many of us are guilty of doing just that.

Is it wrong? Is it fair or does it make sense? I know that I’ve been guilty of doing this and hadn’t really thought too much about it. Now as I think and write, it has become something that I’m not proud of.

I have many friends and acquaintances’ from different walks of life. Many are involved in things or believe in things that I either don’t believe in or would never participate in or support. I’m friends with pastors, atheists, lesbians, drug users, alcoholics, people on welfare, single parents, divorcees, convicted criminals, people having affairs, thieves, liars, abusers and recovering addicts. I am not one of these things, but these people have made a significant difference in my life. Thankfully, I didn’t always make a pre-judgement based on their titles, or I would’ve missed out on some amazing people.

Am I saying that we need to invite each and every person, no matter what they do or where they come from to share in all aspects of our lives, absolutely not. What I’m saying is that we need to stop writing people off as “unworthy of our time” because they don’t meet our ideal picture of what a person should be.

Not everyone is cut out to be a mayor, but they could be an awesome councillor. Not all people can serve the role of best friend, but they sure are fun to go out with for coffee. I won’t let certain people babysit my children but I’d happily let them dog sit. Different people serve different roles in our lives and that is okay. We need to stop trying to make everyone fit into a mold that we’ve created.

Most of us have people that we are close to. People that we share our dreams and secrets with. People that we go to for advice and support. These people are a blessing, and we need to hold on to them tightly and cherish the gift that they are in our lives.

But what about the other people in your world? The ones that don’t share your faith? The ones that look different? The ones that have different lifestyles? The ones that are struggling with addictions? The ones that have zero support system and are just flailing about? What do we do with those people?

I say that we honour them for just being alive. For making it through another day, in spite of their circumstance or trials. That we recognize that though their choices are different from ours, that doesn’t necessarily make those choices wrong. That it’s okay for us to not all be the same.

You don’t need to let strangers into your home to include them in your life or hand them over a wad of cash. You don’t need to attend their marches or events or their churches. You don’t have to give them the clothes off your back or the keys to your car. Be smart but act first in grace as opposed to judgement.

Giving of ourselves in no way compromises our life or our own personal story. Be a listening ear, a helping hand or a smiling face. Having coffee with someone who is completely different from you does not make you “become them”, it will change you for the better. It will help you see the world through someone else’s eyes. It may make you appreciate your life a little bit more. It could possibly change their story and help them feel hope. Or you just might walk away with an awesome new friend. How is any of this a bad thing??

So as we go about our days, I challenge you to look at people through a different set of eyes. Don’t let your fears or ideals cloud your judgement as there’s always more to a person than what you can see.

Don’t judge me by who I’m sitting with. Judge me for how I’m treating them.

I know that I will now be holding myself to a higher standard. How about you?


A little bit about ME.

Thanks to Tamara at FIERCE for thinking I was Fierce & Fascinating enough to be featured on her website. I’m truly honoured and grateful for being chosen.

I don’t like talking about myself, and keep getting asked to do just that, so hopefully this will answer some of your questions. Maybe I’ll get brave enough to answer more another day.

5 reasons April Wiens is someone you need in your Life 

(How’s that for a title … a little bit overwhelming to say the least).

I truly am a blessed woman and surrounded by amazing people. The friends that I’ve been blessed with have helped make me who I am. I hope to never, ever forget that.

i am who i am today picture

C is for Coconut Oil

After the kids are all put to bed and the Mom’s find a comfy chair, Twitter comes to life. We talk about things that people probably shouldn’t really even talk about. We laugh like crazy, and someone usually ends up  “spitting out their drink” after reading a tweet. We tease each other, complain about our kids, our husbands and our jobs. We have a whole lot of fun.

The cool thing about Twitter is that you end up “meeting” people who are nothing like you. Quite often, you start out by having nothing in common except a mutual friend or a business that you both love. And soon enough you end up talking with hippies about things you know absolutely nothing about.

For example, you learn about this.

You will also learn that his name is Herman, and that you’re supposed to DRINK it. I’m still not really even sure what it is. Scoby or Kombucha or something like that. But it will always be scum growing in a jar to me. Always.

You will then start hearing MUCH talk about the virtues of this item.

For those of  you that  follow me on Facebook or Twitter, you will have heard me speak of Coconut Oil, and it will have made no sense to you. Until now. “People” will go on and on and on about how wonderful Coconut Oil is.  How it can pretty much do anything and that it will change your life. And how it tastes SO good and blah, blah, blah. Did you know that you can use it as deodorant and also as toothpaste? It’s become such a running joke that pretty much any time someone has an ailment, or a problem with their car, or an itch or a scratch, we suggest that you rub coconut oil on it. No, it doesn’t make sense, but it seems to be a conversation topic that just doesn’t get old.

During one of our nightly Twitter Chats, Coconut Oil popped up into conversation again. As usual, Meaghan was extolling its virtues and told us that she eats it right off the spoon. We quickly asked for clarification and were told that she does, in fact, eat it by the spoonful right from the jar.

She dared us to try it. And now, I don’t know about you, but when a dare is presented, it is most definitely considered and quite possibly taken. Even though Jen and I are convinced that Meaghan is trying to convert us into hippies, I thought, “how bad can it be, it smells like tanning lotion and pina coladas”. Meaghan also did say that is was  “nom” AND there was the threat of being disowned. So I did it, I ate a spoonful of Coconut Oil, right out of the jar. Jen was brave and also took the challenge, but was smart enough to record it with pictures.

See her face? It was worse than that. It WAS like eating a heaping spoonful of sun tanning lotion that tasted nothing like coconuts. It coated my tongue and throat and it took 2 days to “uncoat”. It was disgusting, and most certainly wasn’t life changing like a certain person had promised. It was sick and wrong. After M realized that we had actually eaten an entire spoonful, she tried to tell us that wasn’t what she meant.  She just wanted us to “taste” it, a small tiny bit, “like on the back of a spoon”.  Bah. Too late, we had taken her dare and J & I were now coated in Coconut Oil and were suffering. FYI … Water and Pop don’t help with the de-oiling but Salt & Vinegar chips do.

The evening continued on with more chatter. The coconut oil fiasco stayed forefront as we basically told everyone how Meaghan had tortured us.  People were shocked that we would do such a thing, but once they learned that we had been dared, and our relationship threatened, they quickly sided with Jen and I. Eventually,  a certain “someone” suggested that we were basically even as the jalapenos that she was cutting “were burning her eyes”.  Ooh … yeah, so even.

And then this happened.

For some reason, she didn’t run to her cupboard and whip up the spicy, cleansing concoction.  So I tried the same threatening tactics that she used on us.

And still, in spite of that spirited plea, she refused to comply. She obviously isn’t as good of a friend as Jen and I are. So this is our gift to you Meaghan.

Consider yourself the poster girl for the all new Jalapeno and Coconut Oil Douche which I’m sure either you or one of your Hippie friends will be selling any day now. And watch your back sister, watch your back. Your time will come.

P.S. Meghan is crazy cool. Coconut Oil really is pretty awesome, as long as you don’t eat it “like peanut butter”. I love Hippies but not Patchouli and I will never drink anything named Herman.


This post was Day 5 of the 31 Day Summer Blogging Challenge ~ Please go and read what my other challenge buddies have to say as well!!

Natasha at Natural Urban Mamas    Meaghan at Magz D Life
Aramelle at One Wheeler’s World      Zita at The Dulock Diaries